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| Fog/shower steam, same diff |
And simultaneously, the togetherness and the vacation itself filled me with all the things I adore. It felt like my head and my heart were emptied of everything that weighed on me, and filled it with everything that lifts me up. It was incredible.
And then I came back full of optimism and at peace with my new-found clarity. I went to work curious about the changes to the work itself, but still feeling the soothe of vacation.
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| Monday morning |
But when I said I cleared my mind, apparently I *really* did it. I put all the details about my job on a rusty shelf in a back corner of my brain and then locked it a windowless room...and then ditched the keys in some other, known part of my brain.
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And as I reacquainted myself the old stressors showed up again, too. But I tried to hold on to every last ounce of vacation sanity and I kept reminding myself of what's really important.
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| "This is not important. This is not important." |
But that's a funny process because it involves some weird combination of me trying to stay Zen while trying to relearn everything at a dizzying pace. And of course, my familiar malady of trying too hard to be good at things (even the ones I don't want) haunts me still. So depending on exactly where I am in that journey, my inner dialogue is pretty varied.
When my people-pleasing, goody-two-shoes, habitual self clouds my judgment:
When I realize it:
And also realize this is the pace of my work-life:
But try to remember "This is not important"
When I achieve mental clarity mid-workday and see through all the shenanigans (and my complicit role in them)
For this weekend, my Sunday mantra:
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