Me Lately

You guyyyyys, one of my favorite blogs Ponytail Journal posted this video and I can't get enough.  I find it super soothing and I think I've watched it at least 10 times today.  It's a clip from Fish Thinkers and their collaboration with the NSW Department of Primary Industries in Australia.  I only wish it was longer.  

Galapagos Whalers from Lauren Yates on Vimeo.

Now, if you really want the "Heather experience" click this song first and then stare at (and restart) the the Fish Thinkers video for the whole 7 minutes.  




Aaaaand that is exactly what it feels like to be me today.  Anyone feel like creating a 7 minute loop for me?  :)

Coffee Quest

When we lived in LA, Steven and I were exposed to excellent artisan coffee.  It became a regular occurrence (ie, we got hooked) and we learned to really cherish those little cups of happiness.  Over the last several years, we've tried to find excellent coffee everywhere we've been while also learning to make better coffee at home (I'll talk about that later).  

Here's our favorite coffee by city (mostly so I don't forget over time):

Los Angeles, CA (metro area):

• Balconi Coffee Company (Cold brew is good and the siphon coffee is delicious in addition to fascinating.)
• Coffee Commissary (Espresso, cappuccino, and cold brew are pretty decent.  If they have their biscuits with homemade jam - EAT IT.  I still have food dreams about that damn biscuit.  West Hollywood location preferred.)
• Intelligentsia Coffee (We rotated between espresso, cappuccino, dirty chai, and pour over coffee.  Ignore the overly hipster vibe and enjoy the deliciousness.  Pastries are meh.  Venice location preferred)

Las Vegas, NV:

• Sambalatte (Tip: they usually forget to dilute their cold brew so either bask in the over-caffeinated glory or add some water.) 
• Khoury's Fine Wine & Spirits (Okay, so this is beer and not coffee. We kinda got more into beer than coffee in Vegas. Partly because the beer scene in Vegas is much more interesting than the coffee, but mostly because Jeny/Kevin hung out here and we adore them.  We really came to appreciate this place and look forward to it every time we're back in Vegas.)

Reno, NV:

• Hub Coffee Roasters (We like the cappuccino and dirty chai, their cold brew is hit or miss.  We liked it better when they were just a tiny shop on Cheney street, but the coffee is still pretty good (usually).  Quality control seems to have diminished since their expansion and the consistency of their drinks is less reliable.)
• 32 Cheney Street (I have no idea what this place is called, and they don't seem to have a website. It used to be the original Hub location, but it's a different coffee company now.  But they make great espresso and cappuccino.)  

Seattle/Tacoma, WA (and surrounding areas):

• Cafe Cesura (Excellent espresso, cappuccino, macchiato, cold brew, and dirty chai.  Loved it so much we used to buy the same beans they use  - Caffe Lusso.)
• Valhalla Coffee (Cappuccino is good but they make the very best mocha I've ever had. I'm not really a mocha person, but it was so good I couldn't stop ordering it. We weren't super fond of their beans.)
• Bluebeard Coffee Roasters (We mostly ordered their cold brew and squash bread, both of which are excellent.)

Dubai, UAE: 
      
       in progress

Sven and I tried Espresso Lab a few weeks ago.  It's tucked away inside a pilates studio on a residential street and really easy to miss.  I'm so glad we circled the block twice to find it. Best cold brew I've ever had, and the staff and patrons were some of the nicest locals we've met thus far.

Metal ice balls to chill without diluting.  I really wanted to eat one.

The café Tom & Serg is so easy for us to like.  They have excellent coffee and their food reminds us of LA - heavy Asian and Hispanic influences, super yummy, very pretty, and a tad pricey. 

I love the beakers

Smoked salmon and poached egg                                    Breaky bao (that's Breakfast for all us Americans)

Booked: Bahrain

A month from now we'll be on the beach in BAHRAIN!  Or maybe in the chilled pool if the beach is a million degrees.

Yessssssssssssss

We weren't exactly planning to go to Bahrain, but on his way out the door at 5am yesterday Steven said, "I need a vacation."

You don't have to tell me twice.

Dubai Life: Non-Muslim Groceries

Several of the grocery stores in Dubai have "Non-Muslim" sections where you can buy pork products.  These sections are always completely separated from the regular store (fully contained store-within-a-store) and all your products are wrapped and priced before leaving the area.  This way, the cashier doesn't have to accidentally touch your pork.

Inside this world of pork, you can find things like trotters, sausages from around the world (mmmm chorizo), pigs ears, prosciutto, various pates, chicharrones, and lots of bacon.  But the fascinating part is how many OTHER things are also in the pork section because they contain pork by-products. 

Here are the ones that shocked me the most.  Apparently it's in the gelatin.

Did you know?  

(Please excuse the terrible photos, I was trying to be stealthy.)

Pricey little rainbow porkmallows - $9.45 per box!

The Pop Tarts website says their gelatin is beef derived.  But Dubai doesn't play that game ($4.50 per box).

Graduate to chicharrones instead ($6.21 per bag).

Phoebe: Bedtime Blues

Phoebe has slept on our bed for 3 of the 4 years we've had her.  A couple years ago we even upgraded to a King bed to make everyone more comfortable (she is massive and takes up a huge amount of space).  But for the last 3 weeks, I've made her sleep on a dog bed about 2 feet away from me instead.  I thought life might be better if we didn't sleep with dog hair and paw prints, and if I didn't have to wash the sheets every 3 days, and if we never woke up with Phoebe-induced cricks in our neck and back.  So, I separated our pack.

Of course, Phoebe was not pleased.  For the first 2 weeks she whimpered, and begged, and pleaded for us to let her back on the bed.  But I stayed firm (just barely) and never gave the command to join us.  What I didn't realize though, was how sad it would be when she finally stopped asking.  

For the last week she's come by my side to give me a quick kiss, given us a long and wistful (but silent) look before going into her corner and falling asleep by herself.  And for whatever reason this has made me incredibly sad.  I thought about how she follows me from room to room all day everyday, how fiercely protective she is of me, how excited she gets when we come home, and how she still says goodnight even though I make her sleep alone on the floor.  And then I thought about how I kicked her off the bed just because I want to reduce the laundry load.  It broke my bleeding (and selfish) heart.  The hairless bed is truly wonderful, but it isn't better than my 90lb baby.

So she's back in the bed...and we're cool with it.

Bliss

Gig Harbor House: Buying and Selling

We always knew that selling our house in an unpredictable market only 18 months after we bought it would be an interesting experience.  And oh it has.  My father-in-law is a real estate agent and he keeps reminding me that, "You just never know" when it comes to buying and selling houses.  

And while I keep repeating this mantra, I'm still shocked when we get unexpected news.

When buyer #1 inspection is totally benign, and then buyer #2 asks for $4,000 in repairs.

But while we're on the subject, I've had some time to reflect on the hilarious differences between buying and selling this house.  

Selling our house:

Pricing

Signing an offer

Inspection repair requests

The net sheet

After closing (at least this is how I expect to feel)

When we bought our house:

We had no idea what was happening and it felt like magic.

But as we go farther down the path of escrow #2 I'm trying to adopt a more Zen attitude, inspired in part by my cool as a cucumber spouse.  In a nutshell:

Imma try

Mama

Today is Mother's Day in the US and there's a mama-shaped ache in my heart.  We sent flowers, we exchanged photos, we made phone calls.  But it's still not the same as being there.

I was watching a documentary short on HBO the other day about Ebola orphans (very awkward segue, I know) and one part really stayed with me.  To paraphrase - your mother is the one who loves you most in the world, and no one can love you like she does.  Across time, space, circumstances, and age, this holds true.  

One of my favorite outtakes from our wedding. The mamas are so happy.

Dubai Villa Progress: Little by Little

WE HAVE FURNITURE.
Not a lot, but enough to feel like we're starting to live in this villa instead of squatting in it.  We're embracing the white-on-white-on-white theme because I'm a little obsessed with modern Scandinavian style, and white is always readily available here.  

AND CURTAINS!
This might be more exciting than the furniture.  As much as I love the way our plethora of open windows look, I don't love the way it feels when everyone can (and does) peer into our life at all hours of the day.  And while the curtains didn't quite turn out the way I'd hoped, it's fiiiiiiine.  

FYI - It's still a work in progress and the photos below are super candid (ie - don't judge me for the mess and terrible lighting).

Don't worry, PB still gets to sunbathe on the yoga mat behind the chairs.

Yep, that's pizza.

In short: new country, new house, new style, same dog.

Gig Harbor House: Selling Again

Less than 36 hours after the 1st buyers backed out of the sale of our home, a new offer has been signed with new buyers!

Our real estate agent, Kari, is worth her weight in gold.

My reaction

Steve's

My virtual appreciation for Kari

Phoebe reclines

A couple weeks ago, we bought a pair of recliners so we'd have somewhere to sit while we waited for the couch we ordered.  Steve and I have never been that fond of recliners, but these were the right price, pretty comfy, and attractive (enough).  But apparently Phoebe is an old pro and she's been teaching us new ways to sit in our recliners (after she stopped being afraid of them, of course).

You can sit and watch TV

You can sit and get force cuddles

You can sit UNDERNEATH (but whyyy?)

And you can fly solo when Sven isn't around (her legs look tiny, don't they?)

Gig Harbor House: On Selling - Heather vs. Steven

As some of you already know, we put our house up for sale in Gig Harbor around mid-March.  We accepted an offer a few days after listing and have been moving through the escrow/closing process ever since.  Today, I talked to the title company to arrange the details for signing the final papers in a few days (getting things notarized takes a little more effort here).

And then tonight, I got an email saying the buyers will not be moving forward with the transaction (we're not sure why).  Thirty-three days into the process and like a week from closing, and they will not be buying our house.

WHAT.  

Ugh. As always, we'll just move forward.  The only thing we can do is re-list and try again.  But this is the range of emotions I had within the first 10 minutes of receiving the news:

And this was the range of Steven's emotions from the minute we heard until the moment he went to bed:

So basically, this is our marriage:

we're different, but we dig it

Culture Shock: 1 Month

Warning: this one is long, messy, and serious.

Culture shock - oh yeah, I've got it. I would say it's moderate and I definitely admit to getting frustrated and shedding some tears like, once a week (apparently that's how I deal).  To be fair it's not entirely specific to Dubai, and more about how I turned my entire life upside-down rather quickly.  It's hard to describe what it feels like but being a big empty house (no furniture) with the entire day ahead of me, nowhere to go (no driver's license or car yet), nothing interesting to do (no job and as happy as I am with the new washer, washing clothes is not very interesting), and no one to share it with (Steve's at work and PB's conversation is limited) has been challenging.  But if we're being honest, it's mostly because I'm not working.

But why?  Even before we moved I started asking myself what the point of my days were and whether I was living a full life.  I've spent the last ~10 years diligently cultivating my professional identity, to the point where I thought it was the same as my personal identity.  I spent 75-80% of my waking hours working (or doing work-related things), and the rest of my time trying to recover from it just so I could do it again.  I didn't really pursue hobbies, I haven't tried to make new friends since LA (although I am extremely grateful for the few I have made by accident), I wasn't consistently exercising, and I pretty much stopped learning new things unless they were related to work.  The only non-work things I devoted any effort to were Sven and Phoebe, and if we're being really honest I think they got the remnants of my day, not the best of it.  It was a dangerous mistake to make, but it seems so familiar to many of us.  And because I was successful at work, I let myself believe that I was living well.

But was I really?

Now that work is on hiatus, what am I left with?  Who am I, and what can I do (or know or offer) that isn't related to sitting in an office for 10+ hours a day?  The cold hard truth - not as much as I'd hoped.

So that's why it's been so hard.  I voluntarily turned myself into an empty shell-of-a-person (okay, maybe that's a bit dramatic) and now I have to put in the work to make myself whole again.  And sometimes that's scary...I feel so untethered in a new and unfamiliar way that really has nothing to do with location.  But then I remember we are in Dubai (OMG!), and why, and it helps ground my inner panic.  I'm still committed to the reasons we made this life change.  This break is necessary for me, and comes at the perfect time (and really the only time) to re-center myself, get back to healthy, and break the stress cycle.  (Haha, but first lemme stress about not being able to de-stress!)  There are interests and pursuits I've wanted to explore for so long, but never made the time because I always worked more instead.  And now they're just sitting there waiting for me...I just have to choose to pick them up.

So this is my new reality.  I'm going to experience, and learn, and explore things just because I like them, and keep my boundaries growing.  I'll stop reading job descriptions every day that say "Must be willing to work beyond normal hours and work well in challenging circumstances with strong personalities."  That's the same kind of thinking that got me here.  (Today is day 1 for that count.)  I'll go to the gym and sweat off 10 years of desk-life.  Read a fiction book just to enjoy the story.  Take Phoebe somewhere she can play like the crazy she is (because she needs it, too).  Learn all that stuff I've always been curious about, just because I'm interested enough.  Embrace my inner grandma and make a quilt.

And in my moments of self-doubt, it's helpful to know we're not the only ones who think this upheaval is worth it.  And that even the people I admire have struggled to rekindle their non-professional identities.  My friend Jon, recently wrote this about his own 6-month break, and it was exactly what I need to hear/read:

Over the last 6 months, I have been enjoying an incredible luxury. The luxury of time and space to learn about myself. 

...

Of course, there were times when it was all still incredibly scary. It’s amazing how much of your professional identity imprints onto your personal identity. Without that piece present, it can be very easy to get lost and feel defeated.

...

I now find myself feeling incredibly excited about the present. We have decided to take on a grand experiment. To continue spending more time in new places and trying new passions. To learn more about ourselves and the world around us. To continue to live unconventionally. To become location independent. We are embracing the fact that technology allows for miraculous situations these days.

And so, I'm feeling inspired and starting a new chapter.  I call it "making myself well-rounded again" but my ever-candid and eloquently gifted husband might call it "time to fix yo' self."  

What I do

What Steve says

What Steve really wants to say

Yep

Phoebe is four

May 1st is Phoebe's "official" birthday, or so we've decided.  We adopted her from the West Los Angeles Animal Shelter in July of 2012 and their best guess of her birthdate was end of April/early May of that same year.  So every year on May 1st, we give her a little extra love to mark the passing year.

This year, the treat was TWO (because she's a big girl) seared bone-in rump steaks!  And of course, her method of eating was full of PB flair.

Apparently all Phoebe really wants is a yoga mat of her own (but of course that one's mine).

Waiting patiently for her birthday meal (2 rump steaks and a little cabbage)

Starting the meal by digging around for cabbage first (weirdo), then saving the big steak for last by dropping it outside the bowl.